New Couples Information

Couples new to the club and especially new to the lifestyle are required to come to the new couples seminar.  There we will discuss the hotel rules and the club rules. This only lasts about 10 minutes. At that point anyone that has had experience in "The Lifestyle" can head out and start enjoying the evening. The second half of the seminar we will discuss "The Lifestyle". If you are new or relatively new then we strongly recommend you stay.  This will help you and your spouse to get the most out of the evening and help you to avoid any potential pitfalls. So if you are new, read on!

Most people have the wrong idea of what a swing club is. Many think that itís just one big orgy and you check your clothes at the door and then dive right in, doing anything you want with whomever you like. At Virginia Friends this is COMPLETELY not the case! More than anything else, Virginia Friends is a social club where youíll meet and form friendships with some of the nicest people youíve ever met. In some cases, youíll form bonds that will last a lifetime. Hereís how it works...

When you walk into a swing club for the very first time, you and or your partner are probably very nervous. You donít know anyone there and you might feel like everyone is watching you. Thatís a good sign! That means youíre normal. Thatís exactly how everyone feels their first time.

You might expect a lot when you first come to a club and thatís probably the biggest cause of anxiety for first time visitors. I realize that for many men itís hard to not think about fulfilling all your fantasies about orgies and threesomes involving the man with two women, etc. That could be a huge mistake. As a first time visitor, wives are usually more nervous about the evening, and one sure way to add fuel to that nervous fire is for her to see her husband bouncing off the walls with excitement about jumping into an orgy or looking overly anxious about being with anyone new and that is not his mate.

The best way to approach the evening is with only one single expectation, and that is to have a fun time together. For your first visit to Virginia Friends, plan on having a nice dinner and enjoying the sexually charged dance floor. This way youíll both be completely comfortable, sheís not worried about him wanting to dive into the first orgy he sees and heís not worried about deciding who is worthy of touching his precious wife.

Keep reading because below are a set of rules and suggestions to familiarize yourself with to be sure you have the best time possible.
With this approach you are certain to have the greatest night of your life.

At the end of the night, maybe you'll exchange phone numbers with this other couple (we recommend exchanging emails) or maybe you'll just enjoy seeing them at "Your" club once in a while,,, Remember, it's all up to you.


Come to Virginia Friends with an open mind and a desire for fun. You'll make some great friends and have a great time.

Rules To Live By For A Guaranteed Great Time

* The Golden Rule: "NO means NO". Anyone may say "NO" for any reason at any time even if you are in the middle of a swinging encounter and have changed your mind and want to stop it right there! If you are in a situation that makes you uncomfortable, just say "No". Do not jeopardize your happiness and satisfaction with this lifestyle, or that of your partner, by doing something against your will just because you are afraid to say no. The friendliest way is to say, "oh no thank you, but thanks for asking". Be honest initially, and you will avoid any misunderstandings. Donít forget that peopleís attitudes change and who knows? Maybe sometime in the future you may meet again with a different opinion.

* Always treat one another with respect. After all, this is a party!!!! Besides, you donít want to be rude or judgmental, because you wouldnít want it to happen to you. If a couple talks to you and you are not interested in swinging with them, that doesnít mean you canít be nice to them. They are people just like you! Just politely let them know.

* If you are rejected (and it happens to everyone, including women), Do NOT take personal offense. Rejection is a very personal thing, and itís almost as hard to reject as it is to be rejected. Honesty with each other is crucial. Who knows? You could end up with a great friendship if you handle the situation right.

* Deal with jealousy head on! It is a normal reaction. Remember that this is strictly a physical & recreational pleasure, not an emotional one. Discover what triggers jealousy in your relationship and work it out together. It may mean modifying your activities, but your relationship together is not worth jeopardizing over swinging.

* Always let your steady partner know she/he is number one. Arrive together, take time to caress them, touch base often, it makes one feel secure. And always leave together.

* Use your common sense and good judgment when you are involved in a swinging situation. Be kind, thoughtful, and sensitive. Swingers are people and have feelings too!!!

* Honor any and all prior understandings & rules you have made between each other, and be sure to COMMUNICATE with each other openly and honestly so there are no misunderstandings about your rules.

* Respect the guidelines you set as a couple and communicate them to prospective partners. Open, honest communication is imperative to forming relationships! And please donít forget to respect the guidelines of others. Donít try to "talk them into" changing the rules because you donít happen to agree with them!

* Pay attention to body language. There is more to interaction than words. Consider the body language of the person you are talking with and it will tell you more than the conversation you are having! Be sensitive to the person and you will know what makes them uncomfortable or happy and excited.

* Demand absolute discretion! And be worthy of the same. Discretion is paramount in this lifestyle! Privacy is imperative!!! Never, ever discuss details inappropriately. Everything you do, everything you see, MUST remain private. Virginia Friends has a saying, "Everything you see here, Everything you hear here, must remain here when you leave here".

* Most of all, Have fun!

 VAF Staff

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